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Set The Vibe

One of the most common pitfalls when it comes to this pick-up stuff is that guys rely on talking to women who are EMPLOYEES at stores, shops, etc.

It's very EASY to fall into this trap, and I've seen it a lot in my work with clients in my one-on-one consultations and coaching.  The reason why it's easy to fall into this trap is because the guys know that the woman will RESPOND to them, because
these women are clerks and are paid to interact with the customers.

This does not mean that you can't attract the clerks, employees, etc.  But, if you are only pursuing these women in your pick-up efforts, it's usually a sign that you are avoiding the REAL SKILL DEVELOPMENT.

When you have the REAL SKILL, you can chat to ANY woman, ANYWHERE.

In fact, when you have these skills developed, you will actually do far better with these female clerks, employees, etc.

So, that being said, if you ARE going to try to pick-up the "hired" help, keep the following things in mind:

ONE: DON'T  "PERUSE" THE ITEMS IN THE STORE FOR A WHILE, AS IF YOU ARE TRYING TO "ACT LIKE A CUSTOMER"

I notice that most of the time, guys are trying to avoid being shut down.  So, of course, the best thing to avoid ALL PROBLEMS is to do NOTHING, right?

So then what most guys will do is just kind of look around the store for a while, as they think of something to say.

The problem with this, of course, is that all this ends up doing is CATEGORIZING yourself clearly in HER mind as a CUSTOMER.

The more you ACT like a customer, the more she will put you into the "customer" category in her brain.  And she will thus TREAT you like a customer.

So, it's off with viewing you as a man or potential mate, and it's ON with viewing you as a possible CASH TRANSACTION.

And you can't blame her, either, since what else is she supposed to think?

The OTHER problem with acting like a customer and spending a few minutes looking at things in the store, is that by ACTING like a customer, you yourself kind of feel a PRESSURE to BEHAVE like a customer.

The mind and body are massively linked together, and by adopting the PHYSIOLOGY of a customer, you will FEEL like a customer, and you will ALSO therefore feel CREEPY inside when you even THINK of picking her up.  You start to feel like you are having to "fake her out" and as if you are manipulating her.  And because you will feel this way, it will SHOW in your body language and tonality, and the bottom line is that you will therefore be INCONGRUENT in terms of giving off the sexual, fun, social VIBES.

Your vibe will be a weird inconsistent mixture of things that don't mix well -  a sort of weird mishmash of "I need to buy something but I don't really and I want to talk to you but I don't know how really and I'm not THE MAN!" etc etc.

So, what you should do instead is...

TWO: IMMEDIATELY GO INTO THE PICK-UP!

Now, you can and SHOULD slightly adapt your pick up to the fact she is working in the store, but you should in NO WAY try to act as if you are seriously a CUSTOMER.

It is not a crime for you to be INTERESTED in her.

So you can start with a story, you can start with a playful tease, you can start with anything FUN or interesting, just make sure you DON'T ask her questions like: "How much is this?" or questions about the merchandise, etc.

If you get into customer questions, you are just going to DIG YOURSELF DEEPER INTO A HOLE where you keep on REINFORCING THE WHOLE CUSTOMER VIBE.

And if you THEN try to SHIFT GEARS into pick-up mode after doing this customer mode for too long, it seems as if you are MANIPULATIVE, as if the whole thing was just a ruse designed to cloak the fact you wanted to chat to her, and THAT seems very UNCOOL, in so many ways.

It says lack of honesty and it says lack of confidence. And the crazy thing is that it can even be a GOOD GUY who is doing this, but he just doesn't realize the negative effect he is creating.

So, when dealing with clerks, salesgirls, employees of any sort, it's important to quickly CHANGE the subject from clothing or anything that a CUSTOMER would be talking about and that you switch over to FUN PICK-UP mode. 

This is why, for example, if you DO ask for advice on clothing or whatever you are buying, that you switch modes FAST by, for example, playfully TEASING HER on the very advice she gave you.

OR, you could AVOID the customer/employee vibe to begin with by IMMEDIATELY going into an interesting story that happened to you.

You could even go up to her and say, "you don't belong here" and she will ask "what do you mean"???? Then you can playfully say "you belong at the head branch" ...and then TEASE her by saying "where they straighten out naughty employees!!" etc.

So, my main point is avoid getting TOO DEEP into the whole asking the employee for too much advice, or you can get into a situation where the VIBE is all about customer/employee rather than MAN/WOMAN, PICK-UP, etc.

So avoid asking "how much is it", avoid asking about the merchandise, instead turn the whole thing into a playful thing, by for example saying that you were thinking of buying the store and how much the store would cost to own, and if you could set up a cafe in the middle for guys who are with their girlfriend and are bored as hell so they could at least watch the sports channel while their girlfriends are shopping, etc.

And then, based on her reply to you, you could have a conversation going back and forth, and then you could bridge into more rapport type conversation where you are both asking more "real" types of questions about each other and you get to know each other a bit before you take her number or email, etc.

And if you are reading this right now, then I suggest you get the FULL PICTURE on EVERYTHING to do with pick-up and with what happens BEYOND the pick-up as well, which is a topic that is CRUCIAL.

And if you haven't already downloaded my eBook, "The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women", then do that NOW at:

The Dating Wizard

Till next time,

Michael