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Worst Pick Up Lines of All Time
A hall of fame of catastrophes. These lines are so bad they have achieved legendary status. Deploy only if your sense of humor can carry the fallout.
Worst
“Did you fart? Because you just blew me away.”
Worst
“Are you my appendix? Because I don’t understand how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.”
Worst
“I’m no organ donor, but I’d be happy to give you my heart.”
Worst
“If you were a booger, I’d pick you first.”
Worst
“Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a footlong list of reasons to talk to you.”
Worst
“I lost my keys. Can I check your pockets?”
Worst
“You’re like my little toe: adorable, and I’d probably hurt you by accident.”
Worst
“My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can’t hold it in.”
Worst
“Are you an orphanage? Because I want to give you kids.”
Worst
“Do you have a shovel? Because I’m really digging you.”
Worst
“If I could rearrange the periodic table, I’d put Uranium and Iodine together.”
Worst
“Is your body from McDonald’s? Because I’m lovin’ it.”
Worst
“I’m like a Rubik’s cube. The more you play with me, the more confusing I get.”
Worst
“You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.”
Worst
“Hey, my name’s Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?”
Worst
“If you were a Transformer, you’d be Optimus Fine.”
Worst
“I just got my library card, and I am totally checking you out.”
Worst
“Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m bad at poems... nice shoes?”
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How to Use Worst Pick Up Lines
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The worst lines only work if you both know they are the worst. Deliver them like a dare, not like you think they are smooth.
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Lead with the disclaimer: "I have the worst pickup line ever, do you want to hear it?" Getting a yes turns a bad line into a shared joke.
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If it flops, that was the plan. Say "yeah, that one is retired now" and ask a real question.
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